The 8 Lies Every Michigander Believes Each Winter

Every winter in Michigan starts the same way: a dash of hope, a pinch of audacity, and a heaping scoop of delusion.

Why We Believe Winter Will Be ‘Not So Bad

We get a late day in October that is unseasonably warm and think, "You know what? This year won't be so bad." And that, my friends, is the first lie.

Because if you live in Michigan long enough, you learn that winter isn't just a season. It's a test of character.

Lies Michiganders Tell Themselves Every Winter

See how many of these lies you've told yourself so far this winter.

Lie #1: "This winter won't be so bad"

We say it every year. And every year, February shows up and says, "Hold my beer."

Lie #2: "I'll get used to driving in the snow"

You've lived here your whole life, but one little skid and suddenly you're gripping the steering wheel for dear life. Meanwhile, someone in a lifted pickup speeds past you doing 85.

Lie #3: "I'm going to stay active this winter"

You bought the boots. You bought the coat. You created the Pinterest board.
And yet, you haven't moved from the couch since December 12.

Lie #4: "At least it's pretty"

Yes, fresh snow is magical. For about six hours. Then it turns into gray slush that gets stuck up under your car wheel wells and turns into 'snow boogers'.

Lie #5: "I'm not going to complain this year"

We complain because we care. And also to trauma bond with other Michiganders.

Lie #6: "This is the year I'll enjoy winter activities"

You go sledding once and that's it because it your back still hurts a week later.

Lie #7: "Spring is just around the corner"

That unseasonably warm day in February tricks us into thinking that spring will be here soon. Then April surprises us with another snowstorm just to spite us.

Get our free mobile app

Lie #8: "My car will be fine"

That warning light? Decorative. Those tires? "They're probably fine." The potholes? Hopefully they get filled with snow.

The Truth About Winter That Michiganders Avoid

Despite everything... we're a little proud to have survived this madness. We earned our summers. We earned our lake days. We earned patio season.

And next fall? We'll do it all again.

"This winter won't be so bad."